Tuesday, December 11, 2012

bigger person

I wish I could be the bigger person, I really do.

It's a struggle and I'm constantly torn, making my way precariously down that line between being an unforgiving, bitter bitch and allowing people to continue to hurt me.

I'm reminded that Jesus allowed people to hurt him and that He forgives people for their hurtfulness, even when we continue to pummel Him with our stones of sin.

But He expects repentance. In order to turn away, you must first recognize.

You do not.

Yet I forgive you anyway because I love you.

And because I know that you love me, in whatever limited capacity in which you are capable.

I forgive you because I am scared not to - because I don't want to carry around the pain of it all and the burden of my anger for you, because I don't want to pay that price, because I don't want to be that person.

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